2003-08-23
5:54 p.m.

BEVR: Babs/St. Paul

Broad's Eye View Report: Babs/St. Paul

"A Star is Born"

The first show on the 39-city tour. Mmmm, I thought to myself when I heard about this historic event... this is something I shouldn't miss. There might be history in the making. This could be the start of something big. As so it goes, here is my Broad's Eye Review Report from Minnesota. It is belated as the show was on July 8th at the Excel Energy Center in St. Paul, MN. But nonetheless, it was a ground breaking event for all the American Idols, but especially Clay Aiken, the smurfy skinny white guy turned into Pop Prince of all the workaholic broads who have lived to tell about the 70s Bobby Sherman, Davy Jones of the Monkees, Peter Noone of the Hermits and 80s Rick Astley. We have lived to tell about because that's just how we are. We observe everything and live to tell about it. So the story goes.

My name is Babs, I am 48 years old, a kick-butt marketing executive by day (real job). With a second real job as an antique dealer turning trash to treasure but mostly hauling junk from my garage to the store and then back to my garage when no one buys it. So between the real job and the second real job I don't have a lot of time for anything. That is until I discovered Clay Aiken and his silver pipes and super delicious flat-ironed hair and never ending freckles. Did I also mention niceness, courage under fire, gracious in defeat, super-cute without being cheesy and a fine Southern gentlemen to boot? Ruben S. may have won the title but Clay Aiken has won the hearts of true music lovers everywhere as well as aging (and younger!) Lecherous Broads who are on a mission from God to champion his brilliant career and support him till the end of time.

Now the concert. My seats were in the upper left mezzanine - a great seat to see all the entrances from below the stage. My first inkling that Minnesota was Clayneapolis was when they flashed his picture on the large video monitor. People were screaming and going nuts. Then the concert started and we went through all the nine, till Clay. When in a cloud of dry ice, he appears coming up from the floor singin, "This is the Night". Now this is the night was just a taste of things to come. After the song, he made special mention of "how nice everyone is in Minnesota." The crowd loved it. Then he introduced Mr. Big, Ruben and you know the rest. Since everyone in Minnesota is actually really nice, we gave him big cheers. But we knew for sure that this was Clayneapolis and there was no chance that our distinguished guest would be disappointed with this audience.

Now act two, the boys appear in white, the little broads in black. Not being a fan of hip-hop I had never heard that booty song. Anyways here was the booty song and the lady is a tramp song, which was very entertaining and lively. Then Clay and Ruben did their The Doggone Girl is Mine which was marvelous. What chemistry and comic timing! Everyone was eating it up. During the banter Clay was speaking, "You had the girl in Alabama and the one in Ohio, you stole my title..." That was really cute.

As for underwear and stuff thrown on stage. No one threw any. This being Minnesota, us Scandanavian types don't take to that kind of overt display of affection We are mostly the kind that enjoy our Clay Aiken in private, like viewing the American Idol tape numerous times or using Photoshop to create boyfriend make-believe pictures of Clay as a screen saver (home computer, not one at work... I mean really... gotta keep the obsession under wraps).

I have to give kudos to Trenyce and Kimberly Locke. They were outstanding. Some record producer needs to sign them right away. Rickey Smith and Charles Grigsby really knew how to work the crowd and are born entertainers. Carmen sounded great and so did Julia DeMato (better than Christina Aguilera on the Beautiful song). Kimberly Caldwell works the crowd like no one else ever did at a Six Flags amusement park.

Oh ya. Ruben. He was crowned the champ and that's real nice. But in the scheme of all things musical would you really want to be stuck in a prison cell and have to be tortured with that annoying Flying Without Wings song like some kind of Chinese water torture only with those words and his uninspired interpretation of it. I think not.

To be honest the rest of the concert was a blur except for one very important detail. Invisible by Clay Aiken was the top-down, bottom-up greatest pop performance, musical interpretation that I have ever seen on stage. He was on fire. HOT. HOT. HOT. The lyrics were intriguing, the voice sexy and fearless. The footwork and attitude - taking no prisoners. The crowd went wild and almost drowned him out but he kept on clutchin the Minnesota Wild Jersey and doing his wild Clay thing. Now I am literally twice his age, but damm that boy is HOT. Who would of thunk it? Certainly not the dreadful sl**on sc*well!!!

After that song, there is no doubt in the mind, that Clay Aiken is the next great thing. He is this generation's answer to Frank, to Elvis, to Mick, to John, Paul, George and Ringo. A star was born at the Excel Energy Center in St. Paul, Minnesota. There is no turning back now. There is nowhere to go but multi-platinum. Note to idiot record producers, bring out his CD soon before I age any further! Note to video folks, make a video and release it before I have to go to the nursing home!

All in all, a great night. A night where Clay saw the embarrassing applause and riches of his ever-increasing fans. A night where he was stunned by the effects of his persona and talent. A night where true magic was captured in a break-out hit performance of Invisible. You know what? I think Clay Aiken in his first concert performance discovered what he was meant to do in life. His calling is to sing and to entertain. He bathes in the love and adoration of his audience like he is savoring a fine wine. He is humble and gracious and he gives back. Knowing what I have read about his past it is almost as if the applause and the love he gets from performing is soothing the past hurts and disappointments, giving him back the love that he richly deserves.

Babs

-Note from Nelle: You, too, can participate in the LBFCA Summer Series, and have your Broad's Eye View Report, or, for any other Brude's out there, your Summary of Clay, about Clay's Summer Concert Tour on the LBFCA Main Page. Just send it to Nelle via email, and she'll post it ASAP. (If you are a lurker, or otherwise wish to remain anonymous, just let me know that in your email). Don't worry about your BEVR not being the same size or looking the same as anyone elses. Here at LBFCA we celebrate diversity. Every BEVR is unique. This is your personal experience of witnessing what Katynka so gloriously described as "a little hockey-jersey-clutchin,' white-leather-wearin,' DTTR revealin,' mic-flickin,' thigh-strokin,' eye-f***ing, smokin,' jokin,' singin,' hunk-o-burnin' libido."