2005-03-15
11:04 p.m.

Idol in Indonesia

All right, Broads. We need to get some control here. We're supposed to be about love, lechery, and laughter, but ever since those first pictures of Clay in Aceh surfaced, we're a little heavy on the love and much too light on the lechery and laughter. Clay Nation looks to us for some light-hearted lechery, but what will they find now? The purple pages are ringing with cries and sighs and professions of love. "I love him so much!" "My heart hurts!" "I'm bawling!" "My ovaries burst!" "He's an angel!"

It's time for some intensive de-sappification therapy. Let's watch this CNN video together and come up with some Broadly captions. All together now:

"UNICEF Ambassador Clay Aiken was in Aceh today teaching the local children how to do jazz hands."

"Yes, and I saw that the name on the card was this long...."

"Ah call this one the Driving Move. That's it. Just like you're driving a car. Makes the ladies go wild. Ah have no idea why."

Mmmm, look at those shoulders!

And that cute little a$$!

"Ahm Clay and...." (Ding dang it, I can't think of anything funny for this one. Next picture.)

(*sniff* Excuse me, I think I have something in my eye.)

(Deep breaths....I can do this....)

I love him so much! My heart hurts! I'm bawling! My ovaries burst! He's an angel!

Ahem.

Um, that's enough for today, Broads. Good first try. We'll try again tomorrow. Let's just hope we don't get any more pictures of Clay in that UNICEF armband...with children...singing....Nelle, can you pass me a tissue?

by Katynka