2004-11-29
10:46 p.m.

Happy 26th Birthday, Clay!!

What do you give a man who has everything?

A bestselling book. Another hit album. And yet *another* successful tour.

A new house. Friends. Family. Throngs of women at his beck and call.

That one freckle riiiiight there that drives ya crazy.

So, what do you give him? The one thing he's clearly begging for.

A spanking.

All right, we need 24 Broads to line up pronto. I don't wanna hear any whining. First come, first...well, whatever.

Yeah, I know he's 26. But the first and last places in line are spoken for. Single file now...don't make me get more bossy than I already am... ;o)

Now, now, Clay...don't think covering it up is gonna get you out of this. Trust me, it's gonna hurt us a lot more than it hurts you.

(Oh, who am I kidding? It's SOOOO gonna hurt you more! But I promise I'll make it up to you later.)

Okay...assume the position, young man.

There ya go.

I'll take the first shot. Everyone ready?

Whew...oh my.

*WHACK*

Okay, y'all go...one at a time...

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

Well, looks like someone isn't having such a bad time after all! Git him, Jill!

*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*

All right, NO GOOSING!! Jannet, you know better than that. Out of the line�somebody come take her spot...off to the shame corner with ya...

Jannet skips off, giggling...and quite proud of herself.

Okay, that's 15. Let's go. He�s getting tired.

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*

What's the matter? Getting sore, honey?

*WHACK*
*WHACK*

*WHACK*

*WHACK*

*WHACK*

Okay, that's 25. One more. You ready?

Sees the lustful glint in Kat's eye.

All right, Kat...give it your best shot.

*WHACK*

Awww...come here sweetie. Time for the rest of your present!

Julie throws him over her shoulder and runs off.

-- Julie, who's got a bath drawn and ready to soothe his lil bum

Mucho thanks to Kat and Cella for helping with the incredibly painful task of assembling this collection of photos...egads, the things I do for you people!...and to fortunate photographers everywhere!