Lecherous Broads For Clay Aiken!
Lecherous Broads for Clay Aiken!


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2004-12-18
10:42 p.m.

Someday My Prince Will Come

...if I have anything to do with it!

Christmas 2004. Marshall Field's in Chicago unveils their holiday windows. And some staff member's no-longer-secret obsession.

Yes, it's true. Somewhere in the Marshall Field's display department is a Clay fan who has decided to come out in a big way.

This year's theme was simple enough. Snow White, modernized a bit. Give her a fake Louis Vuitton purse (emblazoned with "SW", natch) and a carriage that looks like a taxicab. But how to create the perfect Prince Charming?

This Marshall Field's staffer knew what to do. Model him after the most charming bit o' business she's ever seen.

Think we're kidding?

Ladies and Gentlemen...and more Ladies...I give you Prince Charming.

Is it my imagination or does Snow White look a little...older than she usually does in storybooks? How much you wanna bet this Marshall Field's chick is a petite brunette?

And quite possibly a BROAD, because the backside is just as accurate! She's also clearly showing us all what she'd like Clay to wear on their wedding day, and to that, we say "Nice choice!" (Although she might want to find out if Marshall Field's does on-site crown adjustments...'cuz it seems like hers might be a wee bit snug.)

Don't we all wish we could wake up like this? (and if he can do that with one kiss, imagine what he could have done to her with his eyes!)

So, Clay...on Monday, when you're in Chicago, if you find you have some time on your hands, go check out your double at Marshall Field's. Just follow the trail of startled onlookers...but be careful not to slip on the female passersby who've liquefied and turned to ice.

-- by "Grumpy" Julie and "Bashful" Cella, with graphic blandishment by Julie

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