Lecherous Broads For Clay Aiken!
Lecherous Broads for Clay Aiken!


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2004-01-30
7:17 a.m.

Wizard of Oz Chapter 4

Chapter 4

As the Purple Brick Road winds farther and farther into the forest, the trio huddles closer together. They can only see a few feet into the dense growth and the canopy is so heavy it looks like twilight.

"There, um, there aren't any, like, wild animals out here, are there?" ventures Carmen.

"How would we know? It's our first time here too," Kim snaps.

"Now ladies, we need to stick together. I'm sure there are some animals around Carmen, but I've seen you handle the goats - you really have a rapport with them, by the way - and I've seen what you can do to a scarecrow, so I'm not worried."

"Maybe there are lions�"

"Or tigers..."

"Or bears�"

Just as the group begins to sing their mantra, a goat comes charging out of nowhere.

"I know, I know, I won't sing anymore," sulks Carmen.

The goat, looking dazed wanders off into the thick underbrush, emerging seconds later and bolting in the other direction.

"Well, something sure scared that poor thing," says Kim.

Suddenly, a loud crashing sound draws their attention back to the forest edge. A huge hulking figure is approaching and it doesn't sound friendly.

"I'm the master of all I see... Can't you tell by the bling I wear? Everyone I know wants to be me ... I'm the Velvet Teddy Bear."

This is all accented by a heavy and obnoxious beat box rhythm. The trio cowers from the stranger, while Raleigh yaps incessantly around its feet. It is soon obvious that this is neither a monster nor an actual bear, but a very large man. He leans down and gently scratches Raleigh behind the ear. She immediately decides he's OK and rolls over for a good belly rub.

"Hey there, cutie pie," oozes the smooth baritone. "Why are you and your friends here in the woods? Are ya' lost?"

"You've got a really nice voice," ventures Clay. "Why are you wasting it on that really bad rap song?"

"See, I used to sing some cool songs, man, songs that soared and made people melt. I used to bring it on."

"What happened?"

"Well, everyone started telling me what I should be and how I should act and pretty soon, I didn't know who I was and I lost my music mojo. I was always shy, but I couldn't do interviews and all they wanted me to sing was this rap s***."

"Hey, there are ladies present Teddy Bear, watch the language."

"Sorry, man. I just wish I could find myself again. So I can sing the way I was meant to." The hulking man now breaks into a huge infectious grin and says, "And my name is Ruben, not Teddy Bear. That's just a nickname I picked up."

"Well, Ruben, I'm Clay and this is Kim and Carmen, and this may be your lucky day. You see, we are on our way to see the great Wizard of OZ himself and I bet he can help you find your, um, what did you call it?"

"Music mojo."

"Yes, music mojo. What do you say?"

"I say - do y'all sing?"

"Clay and I sing all the time, but poor Carmen is retired until she meets the Wizard. It'll be nice to have a third harmony."

"Then what are we waiting on�Let's go!"

As the group continues down the Purple Brick Road they notice the sky getting brighter and the forest thinning out�they have made it through. Clay, Kim, and Ruben are singing amazing harmonies, while Carmen marches along beside them and Raleigh ventures ahead on the path little by little. As they crest the top of the last hill out of the woods they are singing: "Because of the wonderful things he does, We're off to see the Wizard, the Wonderful Wizard of Oz."

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3

- By: Doc in NC
- Illustrated and Posted By: Wendy in FL

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