Clay:
No reason!

Kelly:
What are you doing?
Are you looking at those freakish fansites again?

Clay:
No Kel-ly Ah'm Nawt doin' anything!

Kelly sits for a second...

Kelly:
Oh My Gawd ...

She rips the curtain open.
Shhhhhhhhkkkk !!!!!
Raleigh is dressed in dog clothes.

Kelly:
(dropping her jaw to the floor)
You are freakish Clay Aiken ...
you and your little "dressed" dog ...

Clay:
Cover your ears Raleigh ...
(Clay covers Raleigh's ears.)
Aunt Kelly is just mad because all the people love daddy.

Kelly:
UH!

She rips the curtain closed ... Shhhhhhhkkkkk!!

Clay:
(whispering)
Just ignore her ..

Raleigh licks his face. Suddenly a shriek fills the air. The curtain flings open. Shhhhhhhhkkkkkk!!

Kelly:
Raleigh!!

Kelly is jamming a pair of pee soaked shoes into the bunk.

Clay:
Mah Heavens!

Kelly:
You and your freakish little dress up dog owe me money!
Those shoes are ridiculously expensive and I had no business buying them ...
SARGE STOP THE BUS!
You have got to teach her how to do her business outside!

CLAY:
But Kel-ly there's things outside ...
Like germs and bugs and dirt!!!

Kelly:
(standing with hands on hips)
Clay, she's a dog ...

Kelly then proceeds to jump up onto his bunk and grab him by the ear and pull him down off the bunk.

Clay:
Ow! Ow! Jerome ... make her STOP!

:: Jerome is snoring ... loudly::

Kelly forces the Princess Hat on him and tosses him off the bus. He lands on his bum. She then tosses Raleigh after him. Clay is so UP SET! He is SO! UP!SET!

Clay:
Raleigh are you okay?
That Hoss didn't hurt you did she?

He suddenly notices that he and Raleigh are outside on the ground.

Clay:
Oh Good Lord!!!

He scrambles to pick up Raleigh before her paws touch the dirt. He unties the jacket from around his waist and lays it out on the ground placing Raleigh on top of it.

Clay:
We'll just sit here for a while and then we'll go back ...
she'll never know ...
What is that sound?

Clay looks down and Raleigh has experienced her first "roadside elimination" right on his favorite jacket.

CLAY:
Mah Jacket! Raleigh! How could you?

Raleigh knows she's done something wrong and bows her head ... Clay is powerless to the cuteness.

Kelly:
(hollering from the bus)
Are you done yet?

Clay:
Uh, yes ... we're done ...

He decides to leave the jacket there ... in the woods ... on the side of the road. He approaches the bus. Kelly is standing in the doorway ... hands on hips.

Kelly:
Where's your jacket?

Clay:
I uh, guess I lost it ...

Kelly:
You were 20 feet from here ... how could you lose it?
Wait ... she piddled on it didn't she?

Clay:
So what if she did.

Kelly:
You are going down tonight in Scrabble, Princess boy ... so get ready!

Clay is standing at the door of the bus as it closes behind him ... He turns and gives a look to Sarge ... and in the words of Daffy Duck ... a small sound escapes his lips.

Clay:
Mother ...