2003-11-06
7:59 a.m.

Broadmuda Triangle: Carol (FL)

Hi. My name is Carol and I�m an Aikenholic. I just thought that I�d get that out of the way before I share my story with you.

I guess I�m a bit of a reverse snob, because I actually pride myself on not succumbing to the "name brand" circus that so many people seem to buy into. I don�t wear Calvin Klein, Donna Karan, Nike or even Pepsi or Snapple clothing. For the same reason, I also tend not to watch highly hyped shows, as I�ve found them, usually, to be a huge let-down. Hence, I did not watch, nor have any interest in watching American Idol I. Oh, I knew the showdown was between a nice-looking, racially mixed male and a cute-as-a-button white female. I also had heard about the nasty British judge, who routinely reduced contestants to tears. That�s all I knew about it and, without having ever watched the show, I figured Justin would win, in the interest of political correctness and all.

But then the commercials for AI2 began airing, and I couldn�t help but think this might be a bit of a giggle: watching people who honestly believed they had talent get up and make fools of themselves (to be honest, I respect them a lot. These are the same people who do karaoke night at local bars, which I never in a million years would do. I know how badly I sing). Takes more guts than I�ve got to do that. So, unsuspecting and wide open to a new experience (one might almost say virginal), I tuned in. And I was right! The show was a blast! I laughed myself silly and even found myself groaning along with Simon. I even felt sorry for some of them for the delusions they harbored.

And then my life was turned upside-down. This skinny, geeky guy with glasses walked in and announced to Simon, Randy and the rest of the world that "ah�m the American Idol." Now, I have to tell you in all honesty, I thought that was as hysterical as Keith singing "Like a Virgin." My first thought was, "yeah, right, on what planet?" And then that angel opened up his mouth and I, too, was fully under his spell. Yes, he had me at "take"! My butt still hurts from where I landed on it when I fell off my couch all those months ago. To be honest, he wasn�t the only one who impressed me. I was all about Frenchie Davis (I loved both her talent and her confidence), and when she got booted, I was devastated. I think that is when I began to pay attention, in earnest, to the young man we now know as Studmuffin (among other deliciously descriptive names).

It didn�t take many weeks before I was a full-fledged Clay Aiken fan. Oh, admittedly, I split my votes in the beginning. I had to see Kimberme go through (sorry, I�ve always loved her voice and stage presence). But there came a time, when I realized that I would have to make a commitment to one performer, and one performer only. And it could be no one else ~ it had to be Clay, the "skinny white boy" from North Carolina.

At the time, and because I do shift work, my days off were Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday. My friends all knew this and I was inundated with invitations to go out on Tuesday evenings. "Sorry," I�d say. "I have to stay home and vote for Clay." Wednesday would arrive and I would be invited out again. Once again, thanks, but no thanks. I had to see if he�d made it through to the next round

And so it went. And somewhere in that time period (when you get as old as I am, you get a little fuzzy about dates, especially when a life-changing event occurs and you don�t realize it at the time), I started cruising the internet, trying to find all I could about this magnificent young man. There wasn�t a lot to be had initially. I think I stumbled onto the LBFCA but I didn�t stick around (heaven only knows why!). My main goal was downloads, I guess. I was an addict. I needed pictures. I hadn�t even graduated to the hard stuff yet ~ mp3s and video clips! But it was just a matter of time.

As information about HRH became more and more available, I scouted out other websites, but maybe it was the grown-up in me (anyone who knows me will refute that vigorously). For whatever reason, I found the other sites juvenile in the extreme and hard to navigate. I found SirLinksAlot and that fed my habit for a while. Then one day, I scrolled down in my search engine and discovered (again) Lecherous Broads for Clay Aiken. I�m a long-time lech and Lord knows that despite being old enough to be Clay�s mom, I didn�t have one, single maternal feeling toward him (still don�t, I�m proud to say.) Hmmm. Might be worth a look. So I came, I saw, and was (happily) conquered. Here, at LBFCA, I have found a "support group" that does not expect me to kick my habit, but helps me to revel in it and lets me know I�m not the only middle-aged "kid" in the world. Like I said, I�m a snob. Y�all sucked me in with, not only your lechery, but your quick wit, amazing intelligence and warm and loving spirits. Many a morning I have spent with tears pouring from eyes from reading both the Main Pages and the Purple Pages. You are now my second habit and I don�t intend to break this one either. I guess I missed the Founding Broads, but in their stead, I discovered the wise and gentle Nelle, the ranting RainJane, the marvelously snarky Marie and the ever-lustful Wendy. I also came to know and love Julie and Lisa, writers extraordinaire! And the rest of you also: Prudence, Merry, Erin, Joe, Tony, Charlie, (and now Van), Dr in NC, Diana Kilbridge, Karen and Karen, eh?, CA Elizabeth and countless others whose names I am hard-pressed to remember at any given time. I have come to know you all and treasure you as sisters and brothers united in Clay.

I can�t remember when I made my first post, but I don�t think it�s all that important. The important thing is, that from the start, I found my home and was accepted by my sister Broads and fabulous Brudes (who knew straight guys could so appreciate our Buttercup?). I�m honored to be a Broad and I wear my Bird with pride. It�s not only Clay who sets the example in this world, ladies. All of you do as well, and I admire and love each and every one of you. I hope I�m never "rescued" from the Broadmuda Triangle.

-Broad (FL)