2006-12-23
10:30 p.m.

Baby, It's Cold Outside!

words & music by Frank Loesser
lovingly rewritten by Julie

December has hit

Baby it�s cold outside

It�s freezing as...heck

Baby it�s cold outside

Your concerts have been

Been hoping that you�d drop in

So very nice

But you�re up north covered in ice

We Broads have a cause to worry

We�re talkin� �bout more than flurries

We want you safe and secure

Sometimes our thoughts are actually pure

You know, when you call, we scurry

Buy plane tickets in a hurry

To when and wherever you tour

The blizzards you make us endure

Now, Yankees might claim

Baby, it sucks out there

Us Southern-folk lame

It�s knee-deep in muck out there

We don�t deal in snow

We love you in cozy clothes

And sleet and slush

Sweaters that fit turn us to mush

You ought to want warm and sunny

Your toes�ll stay toasty, honey

With all the flip-flops you wear

And winter hats just mess up your hair

I just gotta say

Darlin�, just head south

It�s worse than we feared

There�s no flight delays down here

It seems you�re a-skeerd

There�s nary a sleigh down here

Of wintering in

But nevertheless it�s good

A warmer clime

Unless you dig on chopping wood

Imagine "Ave Maria"

My holiday panacea

Beneath balmy moonlit skies

And all that "down south" implies

The combo�s the best idea

Like cimmin on sopapillas

Since someone put dots on ties

Can�t you hear those Broadly sighs

The O.K. Corral

Oh, Baby, it�s so much fun

El Camino Real

Caroling in the sun

A Southwestern Christmas

We call it "Navidad"

Has its charms

We�re flauntin� our right to bare arms

You�re bound to have some control o�er

Just use that cute smile to bowl o�er

The cities where you perform

Your management so you can stay warm

�Cuz, seriously, Clay�

They love you in Flagstaff!

-- lyrics and graphic blandishment by Julie