2003-09-27
8:42 a.m.

Broadmuda Triangle: Kathleen in California

How I Entered the Broadmuda Triangle

This poem is to give special thanks to all those who sent in BEVR’s,

It was so nice to "join the tour" with others who also have Clay Fever!

I’d have joined the tour myself, but my boss is a total jerk,

And there was no way that he would ever let me off from work!

Only a Broad can understand my true feelings for Clay,

How I’d watch him sing his love songs to me every Tuesday,

Before I knew it, I was totally Clay obsessed!

This guy was the sure winner, the absolute BEST!

Every week as Clay’s incredible singing voice would soar,

I found myself falling for him more and more,

My husband and teenage son would look and roll their eyes…

What the h*ll did they know? They’re just a couple of guys!

And through every performance and Simon Cowell snipe,

I soon turned into a Broad of the more lecherous type!

I found myself flying into an anti-Simon rage,

All of this for a jug-eared beanpole nearly half my age!

So when Clay was cheated on the vote count, my heart just broke,

But then I felt even more heartthrobs when dear Clay smiled and then spoke,

After the show ended, the only relief for the passion I now felt for Clay

Was to read the tales written by the gals at the LBFCA,

And so I got sucked into the Broadmuda Triangle,

Which at the time was a "Ranch" where Lecherous Broads could wrangle,

Every day I would visit the "Ranch" and get a thrill from the Broads

Who filled me with witty stories of his clutches, winks and nods,

And then from Chicago, New York, Atlanta, Dallas & Seattle too,

I felt like I had front row seats on the tour, with a Broad’s Eye View!

Visiting the Lecherous Broads each day was just like coming home,

Reading about the Meet & Greets, and Close Encounters with Jerome,

I thrilled to tales about outwitting ushers and smuggling in Clay signs,

I could almost hear the crowd roar when Clay sang "The Girl is Mine!"

And though each tour performance always followed the same song list,

Your BEVR’s cleverly managed to give each stop a special twist.

You brought me along with every bra and panty that you tossed,

(Whoever threw the turkey baster, please explain to me—I’m lost!)

Special thanks to Broads Nelle, Lisa, Erin, Sandy, Marie and Kat too,

Because of your work on the website, this Broad got to join the tour too!

-Broad Kathleen in California

To honor the rich history and tradition of LBFCA, a new series makes its way to our illustrious main page. "The Broadmuda Triangle" wants your Broadly (or Brudely) tale. Who are you? What makes YOU a Broad?

Send your story to Marie via email.