2003-04-09
11:44 a.m.

Joey Ramone to Judge

Agreed, Lisa: Lionel Richie was a decent guest �judge.� Agreed, Kathy: Clay needs to let the Broads dress him (mmmm). I volunteer to be sure he�s got happenin� undies.

Now comes word of Fox�s ultimate guest host ploy. Next week, a ouija board will be mounted beside Simon, and the three resident judges will channel the spirit of Joey Ramone as guest ghost-judge. He�ll be able to hawk his wares as other guest judges have done. Only in this case, promoting his songs will also serve as critical comment.

For example, after Kim C�s performance (assuming she returns): �I wanna be sedated.�

After Carmen (ditto above parenthetical comment): �Teenage lobotomy.�

After Josh: �Now I wanna sniff some glue.�

After Clay, Joey would speak for all of us: �I wanna be your boyfriend.�

Best of all, in Fox�s eyes, is that a ouija board comes cheaper than live talent.

--Chandra