2003-06-16
8:31 a.m.

Public Apology

The publisher and Board of Directors of BROAD Magazine would like to issue this public apology to our loyal readers. For the first time in our publishing history, the pictorial portion of our cover story did not appear, in our June 15, 2003 issue, upon distribution.

The Board of Directors conducted an immediate investigation, and discovered our entire editorial and photojournalism staff in the dark room defiling the photographs and negatives from the 2003 Sexiest Man Alive photo shoot. While attempting to intervene several members of the BROAD Board succumbed to this apparent mass hysteria.

The remaining Board members are currently arranging for animatronic journalists to conduct all future handling of images of Mr. Clay Aiken, the BROAD Magazine 2003 Sexiest Man Alive. While this technology is cutting edge, it may be another day, or perhaps longer, before we are able to bring you the promised photos. We are making every effort to have the photographs cleaned and pieced back together for your viewing pleasure.

Nelle *slurp*